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i'm a 25 year old california girl who, like most of us, is perpetually in transition.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

shameful rice [day 25]

i don't even want to post, but i'm an addict and addicts really want to do the things they say they don' least on some level.

it's why they're addicts.

so i had rice again, it's about 2 cups and it's 400 calories for all of it. 400 calories used to be something i had for a meal, but now it makes me gain weight. part of me thinks it's due to the restricting i did before and now my body's like "fuck that!", but i dunno. today is my last test day with rice, if i still gain, ill put it away in the cupboard and not touch it till i'm at least 250.

here's what i ate yesterday:

day 25

weigh in: 272.5

strawberries 128

soup 113

upon arriving home at like 4:30:
cantaloupe 134

dinner(at around 7:30 when i normally eat at 6):
packet of rice 400

total calories consumed: 775

day 26

weigh in: 272.7

so i've had cantaloupe for breakfast (149) and i brought the rice for lunch (400) [thinking maybe it's because i ate it too late] and i'll have ither the left over soup for dinner or maybe just fruit, or possibly both. i dunno. i plan to consume around the same amount of calories in order to determine if i'm crazy or if it is the rice.

i'm also waiting impatiently for one of the blogs i follow to go under a fast or stringent diet of some variety and ask for ppl to join up and support each other.

i need some sort of plan, someone to talk to, someone who reads my blog, and has helpful things to say, someone who knows my weight, does judge(at least a little), but is pleased i'm putting forth the effort to change it.

if anyone's starting a crash diet and needs someone to back them, please tell me. id love to join.

best luck to all of you.

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