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i'm a 25 year old california girl who, like most of us, is perpetually in transition.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

polyamory and me? [74]

day 74

weigh in: 254.0

broccoli & cheese 300
sushi 440
soy sauce 10?
soy beans 220ish

day 75

weigh in: 252.2

had the smallest container of this weird broccoli salad they had at the grocery store for breakfast. it was sooooo good. just some raw veggies plus raisins and some sort of sweet "slaw" sauce but the sauce was so lightly added that i don't really feel guilty about it. maybe 200 cals for the whole thing? prolly less.

lunch is probably soy beans.
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still no word from the huge crush that just moved here. i'm mostly over it. if he wants to play games, go right ahead. i cared at first, i don't anymore.

besides, i have a new boy to play with. tehe

i dunno if anything will come of this new crush, he's polyamorous. [dates and has relationships with multiple people at the same time, some people are even married or live all together] i'm open to the concept of polyamory but.. i feel like it may overly complicate my life this early on into the dating scene.

i'm also thinking that perhaps that might be exactly what i need. in a labeled way it gives me the things i was actually sort of planning to do anyway. i wanted to date multiple guys and if they all know about it...and are comfortable with it... isn't that better than waiting to be bored with one to move onto the next?

i'm not sure a poly lifestyle is suited for me long term...but it's an interesting concept while i get my "yayas" out.

who knows, maybe i'll fall madly in love with two men and that'll be it for me, poly for life.

i also think having more than one guy have to deal with my attention whore-y-ness would cut down on people thinking im crazy because of the level of attention i desire. lol.

so i talked to him on the phone last night..all fucking night. [4 hours and 43 min according to my call log] we seem to be really compatible on a lot of levels. i just don't know if he can give me the kind of attention i'd want from a guy i'm dating when he has three other women, one of which he lives with.

if nothing else, i totally just made a really cool friend.... who is RIDICULOUSLY HOT.

my god that boy is hot. he has long hair and dresses alt... which i looooveeeeeee. some of his profile pictures even have him in a three piece dark suit with tie...dear christ i died when i saw that. what is it about a tie that makes u want to pull a guy down into a kiss? mmm.. delicious...

anyhow... those are the new developments boy wise.

i have a few messages waiting for me on the dating site once i finish up here.

wish me a good kiss? i don't even need sex... i just want to be made dizzy by kisses.
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liz: eh, i wasn't so much into the phone sex... it just got to a point where it's like...well....?

he sent me a text yesterday morning wishing me a good day, haven't heard anything else.

yeah, my weight seems to be dropping so hopefully by sat i can be 249.9. i'll fast friday except during lunch [cause i'll be at work] if necessary.

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