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i'm a 25 year old california girl who, like most of us, is perpetually in transition.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

binge and loss [69-73]

i'm sorry i didn't post yesterday like i ordinarily would, life kind of got in the way...nothing interesting happened so it's not too much of a loss.

i binged over the weekend.

had fast food twice, couldn't finish my meal ither time, but still:

fast food is fast food.

other than that, i was mostly fine. slips here and there.

again, i'm not going to go into what i ate, because i'm ashamed... however, though i did go up over the weekend, i am back down. plus im back on track so the binge should help me drop more.

my wish is by saturday to be 249.9 wish me luck.

day 69
day 70 252.6
day 71 253.7
day 72 254.6
day 73 254.2
day 74 254.0
there have been lots of boys, lots of talking.

one huge crush, who then proceeded to ignore me, again. he texted me yesterday morning apologizing for not being responsive. haven't heard from him since then.

admittedly he is busy, as he did just fly here for work... but still. if he liked me, he could spend 15 seconds and type a:

"i know my life is really hectic right now,
but i think you're really charming,
and i want to see you soon.
[and fuck your brains out]"

whatever, i'm mostly over it, but if he shapes up i'll give him another round cause.. moving does suck..

had two rounds of phone sex yesterday. [with a different guy] it was alright, still a little tender.

feeling a little weird about the guy now, but he doesn't mind.

still talking to ted and will. both very good friends, though ted is still trying to get in my pants.

i know he means well.

he sees me as someone who needs saving.

he wants to be my hero, and there's something romantic about that.

also, being adored by an artist is a unique experience.

it's nice to be appreciated for the things he notices, as most guys are too dumbstruck by my tits to notice much else.

when he told me about my breasts, he didn't go for the obvious "booooobbbieesssss" comment. he talked about how he watched them move as i took every breath.

i feel like most guys would have miss that. that they would be too caught up in my cleavage and wanting to put their hand/face/cock there.

whatever, still creeped out by his hands on me. maybe over time.

and that, my girls, is all there is.
lilah lee: love you too :)


  1. Yay phone sex! That sounds like fun :)

    I'm sorry you binged, but your weight didn't seem to suffer too much! I hope this week goes better than the last weekend.
    Love ya <3

  2. You'll be hitting goal 4 in noooo time :D
    That's beautiful, your experience with that guy. I'm not sure I know any guy who would notice things in that way.

    Have an awesome day!

    Love ya