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i'm a 25 year old california girl who, like most of us, is perpetually in transition.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

ted is getting under my defenses [87]

day 87 251.3
day 88 ---

i forgot to weigh myself before i ate this morning.. so i don't know. i figured i gained some because i actually ate yesterday. i can finally eat again. both a blessing and a curse. i had two peaches for breakfast, planning to have rice or chicken soup for lunch.
nothing overly eventful has occurred since yesterday.

ted and i spent a lot of time on the phone last night.. turning me on. oie.

can i do this?

he's leaving for two weeks on friday. i guess that will test all of this.

i got a random text from a number no longer in my phone last night. i'm thinking it was the guy i had that big crush on but he had just moved here and never really got back to me. not sure how i feel about it.. i kinda think hes a punk for leaving me out in the rain.

one note about him though, i told him i got a fortune cookie that said something akin to the next full moon will bring an enchanting evening. he told me to mark the day, that he would take me out, and enchant me. tehe.

that was sweet. perhaps he deserves a VERY wary second chance. we'll see... he was pretty damn cute. lol.

i'm meeting up with the friend i had the TERRIBLE revenge sex with this weekend. yeah, remember the facebook cock block? yeah well... apparently things aren't going too well... maybe ill get some kisses...

i don't know. part of me likes kissing him because it's simple and we don't have to think about it the next day... but part of me realizes that kissing him only makes it so it's longer before i get to see him again.

i should really save my sexual conquests for boys i don't care if i see again.

i realize as i type that... that that's kind of a deranged thing to say.. but oddly true.

love you all, my darlings.
it occurs to me, that my blog has more become about boys than ana...
does that make me terrible?
liz: actually i mentioned it by saying something akin to "oh god, you must think i'm a terrible kisser after the kiss we had, i swear i'm better than that" she denied it and said she was awful, that she doesn't know what shes doing and just kind of goes for it. i offered to give her some tips sometime. more girl on girl action? suppose so.


  1. no, it doesn't make you terrible. i enjoy hearing about your conquests in ana or boys. you're interesting in both fields. ;)
    staystrong, page.

  2. Of course that doesn't make you terrible! This blog is yours. You can write about whatever you want :)

    Yay more girl on girl action! I hope you get your chance. Is she hot?

  3. It's your blog, talk about whatever you damn well like!

    Hehe, give him ONE chance only to prove himself. If he doesn't this time, kick his carcass to the curb!